My Daughter is Driving me Crazy
My daughter M. was born xxxx. She seems so selfish, and self absorbed. She acts entittled - is it a 14 year old thing? She tells us that kids today don't have to do housework, the parents do it all. She's really going through a 'poor me' stage.
I was born xxxxxxxx We are starting to fight so much. I would rather work this out peacefully, but she just listens to us and then she's off doing it all again, ignoring us.
I am not sure what to say to you at all. I think most 14 year olds are self-absorbed. Having said that, your daughter is Aries Rising.... she is a little Amazon warrior! But where did she get this from?
You have your Moon in Aries (you're inclined to be impatient); and I also see by your chart, that you're very intelligent, but you worry too much.
You are also Scorpio Rising which is the MOST powerful Rising Sign of all. So you and your daughter are BOTH warriors... but you are stronger.
You both have a similar - and very basic, and very major value system: your home and your family are your number 1 priority in life.
Ultimately, this means you have given her a beautiful, warm and loving home - or how else could she have that value system?
Your daughter has Moon in Libra exactly opposite of yours. You are more comfortable sparring or arguing than she is! Your worry about development, and your competence as a mother is a burden to you.
You have a busy, bright, enthusiastic, creative mind that is also explosive.
I think your daughter will turn out alright. She has a strong connection to you, and a similar value system, which is a compliment to your mothering. She will make money one day from writing or communicating... she has excellent communication skills!
Her contradiction - we all have contradictions - is that she is a warrior who does not want to fight!
That is all I can say. I have no answers. I do believe that anger and conflict in the family are poisonous. (More than we know) She is upset by your fighting more than you are.
Her Moon in Libra strives for harmony.... and her Aries Rising IS self-absorbed - no question. Aries is all about "me" - and getting what they want. They put their interests first.
Right now you are arguing about the division of labour at home. Of course, I believe kids should clean up after themselves. However, often these arguments are about control: they are just power struggles.
It's so hard!
Since the Rising Sign is the modus operandi we assume to survive in our family, she felt she had to fight for her rights from the get go - because you are Scorpio Rising with Moon in Aries. You are a strong mother!! (who easily weeps with frustration- your Pisces Sun.)
The only advice I can give you is this: get a copy of the Seven Habits of Highly Effective People - and (get this) you don't have to read the book! But do read the Introduction. The author talks about how he dealt with one of his kids who was a "problem". And I found it to be very enlightening.
Good luck!! I am so glad my kids are adults now... whew!
But I can see you are a loving mother who cares....
All good things
(I just bought the book second hand on amazon.ca because I gave my copy to my daughter.)